Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Those New Years' Resolutions

I suppose I will try this again, although resolutions never seem to work out. But maybe if I write few thoughts, I'll think about them, and they will guide me. So here I go--subject to revision, of course!

1) "Motivation is what gets something started. Habit is what keeps that something going." I know doing my BORING exercises helps me. It was quite evident that when I tried to get away with not doing them, my skiing was a disaster. To the resolution is to re-establish the habit of doing them regularly, and keep going.

2) Listen, listen, listen. I firmly believe that God speaks wonders all the time if I listen. So, listen to my life. Listen when I am pushing too hard. Think about what that means and what I can do about it. Know that God is right there, pointing things out, if I would just listen.

That is enough. If I do a better job at those 2 things, life will be better.

Happy 2009!

And from our pastor, this Franciscan prayer--awesome!

May God bless you with discomfort, at easy answers,
half-truths, and superficial relationships,
so that you may live deep within your heart.

May God bless you with anger, at injustice, oppression,
and exploitation of people, so that you may
work for justice, freedom, and peace.

May God bless you with tears, to shed for those who
suffer from pain, rejection, starvation, and war,
so that you may reach out your hand to comfort
them and turn their pain to joy.

And may God bless you with enough foolishness,
to believe that you can make a difference in this
world, so that you can do what others claim cannot
be done. Amen.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Where did you find Jesus this week?

I read that question on another blog. Where have I found Jesus? Now that I look, now that Advent is over and I pause (I should have paused DURING Advent), here is where Jesus was and is--everywhere.

- when I was sick, telling me to rest
- when I was skiing, telling me I was doing too much
- when I was taking a day at a time, wanting me to pause instead
- when I want to say yes, to learn to say no, or not now
- as I've been thinking about wanting more time to write
- when I think of my mom
- just now, when I was sitting here and "How can I keep from singing" came on
- as I now go to bed, with those final thoughts before I drift to sleep

Where is Jesus for you? Do you feel it? I do.

Friday, December 26, 2008

Christmas, 2008 style

Here I'm sitting in the middle of my living room where I can only see a few spots of carpet. The same can be said for the rest of the house. It would probably be this way anyway, but I'm allowing myself to sit in the middle of this mess and write, because it has been quite a Christmas week!

Flu season! So much for the flu shot?!! I've been waking up with a fever each day. As a person with MS, that means I can't walk until I have some Tylenol. It started really hitting Monday afternoon, as I sat trying to wrap presents--not being able to detach the tape, not being able to use the scissors. Then my husband returned home and found the Tylenol. Christmas morning was perhaps the worst. I woke up and could not move--rolled off the couch (I slept there so I wouldn't wake Dave up with coughing). I pulled myself to the Tylenol, then just sat there until it took effect. Then came the head cold. What a Christmas!

I thought I'd do some uplifting Christmas post to me, in celebration of making it to Christmas. I did make it, if one calls this making it. And now, these 12 days of Christmas are a recovery time, a realization that I was going to be hit with something, sometime, in the process of doing way too much. Listen Beth, listen!

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Holding things together, one day, one person at a time

It's that holiday time, when everything seems about ready to be out of control, and each year I try to get through it all, and wonder if people realize how difficult it is for people with MS ? Then throw in those _people_, and there's this lovely wonder of trying to hold it all together. And this is Advent, a time when things should not be so chaotic, and yet they are, especially this year.

For the fun part--the _people_. I have to wonder what goes through the minds of people--do people think at all before they just let things fly out of their mouth? So many examples, but I'll just take today. I was volunteering at my daughter's school. It would be my hope that in so doing, people would see someone with a disability as a person. Instead they just say the stupidest things. Today out of the blue someone who I don't know, rather than saying hello, said "Is it hard to move that wheelchair through ice?" Hmm...let's think about that! Then, no hello, but "you should get an electric one of those" from a different person. I think I could write a book with all the comments I've received! Manual, or non-electric wheelchairs, are for people who have enough arm strength as well as ab strength. They are also less expensive. Electric wheelchairs--well, just leave it at they are costly, one needs a different vehicle than what I have, and more. Ugh. I really do people think you pick up these mobility devices at Walgreens, maybe with the drivethrough option!

Back to a day at a time. Every day it seems I have some extra activity. I work full-time. And there is so much to do. So I try to take it day by day,wondering what others do who have MS. I get to my house, walk up the steps, and wonder how I will go to the bathroom, feed the cat, give Lori a snack, and get myself something to eat? Since the me, eating thing comes last, there's no energy left. Today I sat on the bench (I don't use a wheelchair at home) post other stuff. Sitting there, I realized I forgot to get medicine for Lori, but then she decided she wasn't really sick--ok... So, I had the loaf of plain wheat bread. And I had Lori with new books waiting to be read. So I had some bread, then we read the book, then back to the bread. Wheat bread with nothing on it is really not that good.

Made it through today. Tomorrow I hope will be better. And the next, and the next. One day at a time in this season of Advent where I wish I had time to reflect, and instead I'm rushing around like everyone else, because my mind will not slow down.