Sunday, January 8, 2012

The impossible

Today the Broncos won a playoff game. They weren't supposed to win 8 games this season. They weren't supposed to make the playoffs. They weren't supposed to win their division.

Hang on. This blog isn't about the Broncos. It's supposed to be about MS and faith.

There are so many "weren't supposed to" things out there and the commentators being amazed at the Broncos, in a strange way, reminds me about the "weren't supposed to" things in my own life.

When I ran cross country in high school, our team was not supposed to win State when I was a junior. We weren't even on the radar. But we won. The next year, we weren't supposed to lose. There was no way anyone could beat us. But we "lost" - we got third in State. To many teams, third would be a great accomplishment. But to our team, we felt we were horrible. It was a horrible defeat and we responded to so many "WHAT HAPPENED?" questions. When I look back, I was struggling with the beginnings of MS and no one, including me, had any idea. Others on our team were injured.

Hang on. This blog isn't about my former running days. It's supposed to be about MS and faith. I'm getting closer!

I wasn't supposed to get my Masters. I had already quit one program. But after 4.5 years, I finished. I wasn't supposed to finish because I was a mom, married, kid, .........., MS. I finished.

This is about MS. Faith is coming...

I wasn't supposed to walk across the stage to receive my degree. Of all the impossible, that probably trumps everything. Just that week, I received a new brace for my left leg, which allows me to lift my left foot. If you stub your left toe with each step, you can't walk up a ramp to get to the stage, to walk across the stage. So, new brace and Ampyra - up the ramp and across the stage I went... with faith!

It was comical. The school that went before my school was smaller than I expected. They were at the ramp, and then they were going, going, and I was sitting, sitting, suddenly realizing they were disappearing. I took off, wheeling to the start of the ramp, where my walker was. And the other school was... gone! And I panicked, and the guy who works with people with disabilities told me not to worry, but that didn't matter. I got up, and I moved it!

The problem was that my already bent over somewhat ridiculous walking was replaced by me trying to get up that ramp and onto the stage. Any thoughts of trying to stand straight were gone. There was a card with my name that kept falling off my walker. Finally I made it; the lady who read my name grabbed the card on my queue, and announced "Beth Newsom."

I was all smiles. Totally bent over - think of those puppets from the Nutcracker. My picture was taken - I received it and I was all smiles.

My husband taped the big screen version. As he said, I got the most screen time. There's the camera focused on the ramp, with seemingly no one coming. Then it pans to the President talking to the Chancellor, and they're wondering what is happening and somewhat smiling. And then this woman begins to appear. There's a woman who looks really happy, bent over a walker and swinging her legs. "Beth Newsom."

That's the impossible. That wasn't supposed to happen. But it did.

The Broncos weren't supposed to do a lot.

But they did.

Faith did not give the Broncos unexpected victory.

Faith did not give me the ability to walk up the ramp and across the stage.

But faith means God is there always, through the good and the bad. Perhaps faith is shown outwardly more when there is success. But faith, like God, is always there, for many.


No comments: